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Centaur: A Chaotic Tail Part 2

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The God of Chaos watched the little filly meander down the road. It certainly had taken all he had to get that stubborn creature GOING. He'd never felt so frustrated in his life, all that planning and plotting and his lovely little piece of mischief was turning out to be a complete stick in the mud. Still . . . the wreck she left in the town was promising. Brilliant work, the fish barrels upending and sliming a good ten people and making the boardwalk treacherous for quite a while until complete degreasing could occur. That had him smiling in delight and thinking that maybe he hadn't made a mistake after all. Should be interesting to see what happened when she got to the city. His smile became very toothy. Yes . . . very interesting. A promising start now that it was started. "You will do well, little one, this may work out after all."

Peggy's walk continued until lunchtime, with the sun high overhead and the fog completely burnt off. The sun was now blasting up at her from the ocean on her left, and down onto her from above. The only thing making the day somewhat bearable was the persistence of the cool breeze and the occasional tree on her right in the rocky cliff side that the road was now meandering along. She hadn't run into any other people, just an occasional squirrel. In fact, the squirrels here seemed to be rather darker than the ones she was used to. She kept seeing black fluffy squirrel tails in the trees as she passed by them.

She was starting to get hungry though, but she hadn't really seen a good place to sit off the road and eat. She needed someplace flat, ideally, she wasn't good on cliffs or even steep hills, and that was what was on both sides of her. One went up on her right into the hills, the other on her left falling into the ocean waves, making it impossible to find a spot off the road. And she really wanted to be off the road, her master pounded into her the importance of not blocking the road for other travelers. She wasn't small, so she would make a pretty significant roadblock, even if she got to the farthest side of the road. She continued walking until she finally came to a small grassy spot in between the rocks. She wouldn't be able to lie down properly, but the grass was cool on her hoofs and the rocks and bushes shaded the small alcove. It took her a bit to unpack the supplies she'd brought to eat, but she munched on it hungrily. She was halfway through her lunch (which she would admit usually took a while since she did eat quite a bit) when she got her first hint of another traveler.

Hooves on the road, at least two horses by the sound of it, and the sound of wheels grinding on the loose roadbed. She squeezed into the small alcove, more concerned about hiding than just staying off the road. The sound was coming from the direction she was going, so at least she wasn't going to have to be following them, whoever they were. In order to fit properly she had to squeeze in face first, leaving her tail a bit exposed, but at least her human body wasn't visible. Hopefully, whoever it was would simply pass by without a second thought for a stray horse.

Unfortunately, Peggy forgot how valuable horses were.

As the horse drawn vehicle passed, there was a yell. Then she heard the distinct sound of hooves scraping against the road as the horses were forced into as fast a stop as possible. A male voice rang out, "OY! Get some ropes! Looks like we gotta stray that was stupid enough to get itself caught in the rocks!" There was laughter and a general sound of getting things out from containers with hinged lids.

Peggy's heart stopped. What was she going to do now? She couldn't let herself get caught . . . but . . . but they'd see her if she came out! She stayed still agonizing about this until she realized that staying where she was would get her caught and seen for sure. She started to struggle back out of her hiding place, praying that she'd get away before they started throwing those ropes they seemed to have gotten out.

"It's getting loose! Quick Geo! Throw! You've got th'best aim of all o'us!" Those words made Peggy move faster. It was almost insulting for her to think that she'd be roped like a common horse. She moved quickly, but Geo was obviously very talented with the rope. She felt something nab her back legs, tripping her up. She cried out and tried to catch herself with her front legs, but her head hit the rocky outcropping next to her, making her see stars and have a hard time getting her feet under her. She struggled valiantly to get up from her knees, wishing she was still limber enough to reach her back legs like she could when she was a young filly, but her back had grown and stiffened, as had her legs, making such a maneuver impossible even at the best of times. Dizzy from a knock on the skull she couldn't even manage to turn her head properly to try and figure out how to move her back legs to get untangled. Another rope went around her neck. If she had been a horse this wouldn't have been such a horrible situation, but she knew if they tightened that neck rope she'd lose consciousness completely. Maybe even die. The adrenalin surged suddenly and she found herself yanking the second rope off her neck with her hands and pulling on it suddenly and hard, making far more pull than a trapped horse would have been able to manage. She heard a yelp of surprise and a satisfying dusty sounding thud, the rope suddenly going slack. She dropped it and managed to get her feet under her, using her arms to steady herself between the rocks. She kicked her back legs to attempt to get the rope off, and found herself hitting something rather solid but softish with the maneuver. There was a groan and another sandy thud, followed by the sounds of someone writhing around in pain behind her. She figured she must have kicked one of them rather hard. The rope around her back legs went slack enough for her to walk out of it and she finally backed up and turned quickly to face her adversaries.

The scene in front of her was NOT what she'd been imagining while she'd been facing the rock crevice. There was one youngish man on the ground, rope still in his hands, with a bloody nose and scratched up face, chest first on the roadbed. Directly at her feet was an older man, still groaning and writhing in pain holding his middle section and gasping for air. Still on the cart sat an even younger boy and a older woman. These two stared at her in disbelief, like they couldn't believe what they were seeing. The woman kept rubbing her eyes and blinking like she was trying to clear dust out of them. The horses attached to the cart were looking at her with interest as well, ears perked and curious, asking if she was all right and wondering if she'd be willing to join their herd. She respectfully declined their offer and knelt down to check on the older man.

"Are you all right? I'm sorry, I didn't know you were behind me, I was just trying to get the rope loose." She realized this was probably a foolish thing to do, but she did feel bad for hurting the man. She knew he only thought she was a stray horse not a semi-human being and she wasn't one to hold a grudge or want to deliberately cause any harm.

The man groaned, "No . . . I'm alright missy . . . ye were . . ." he stopped and suddenly realized he was talking to the very creature that he'd be trying to capture. Peggy would have laughed at his expression if she hadn't been so concerned for his welfare. She knew a back kick could do serious damage and she hadn't been holding back.

She checked for bleeding, making sure he had no blood coming out of his mouth. "Where did I kick you?"

The man gasped, getting his wits back, "Ye got me right in th'gut lass, but I got good muscles there, once I git my breath I'll be fine." He nodded.

Peggy let out a little sigh of relief and then righted herself to check on the younger man who WAS bleeding. "How about you? Are you all right?" she leaned down close to him to make sure it was all superficial, reaching into her saddlebags for a small cloth and canteen of water to help clean him up.

The lad was staring at her in disbelief, the expression very similar to the older man. He actually looked like a younger version of the older man. Perhaps they were related? He seemed far to distracted to pay attention to his bloodied face and nose. "Wh . . . what . . . are you?"

Peggy sighed and started to clean the boy's face, feeling the eyes of the two people still in the cart on her. "Well . . . I'm a centaur. A female centaur." She smiled. "At least that's what I've always been told."

The older man seemed to finally get himself together and gain his feet. Now there were four pairs of eyes staring at her. Peggy continued to help the lad get his face cleaned up, forcing him to stand up to make the job a little easier on her. The old man cleared his throat, "Beggin' yer pardon lass, but I ain't never heard of a female centaur afore. I ain't seen a male one, but I know they exist. Hear tell o' them down near the big city all the time. But never ever thought there were gals."

Peggy finished with the lad then stood up fully and looked at the older man. "As far as I and the people who raised me have been able to determine, I'm the only one. I'm trying to find out if that is really true. Do you know where I could find the other centaurs?" She looked at him pleadingly.

He shook his head, "There a right secretive bunch . . . jest rumors floating around about a hidden valley that they hide out in when they're not puttin' on raids on villages and whatnot." He looked carefully at her. "Ye don't seem as violent as I've heard most centaurs are."

Peggy shook her head and swished her tail, "I'm not. I hate violence really. I only fought because I though I was in danger. You understand that, don't you?" she really did feel bad now, these people hadn't meant her any harm and she'd hurt them.

The man shook his head and laughed, "Ahhh . . . yer no worse than what a normal wild horse woulda done. No worries lass, I've taken worse from bigger beasties than you." He grinned and showed his teeth, or rather, the teeth he still had. There were rather large gaps where some were obviously missing. He walked over to the young man and checked his nose, "Ah, Geo, yer lucky. Didn't break yer nose . . . jest a lot o'blood."

"Yes pa." The young man was still staring at Peggy in disbelief, looking like he still couldn't sort out how something so odd looking could be standing in front of him.

Peggy sighed, "I really am sorry. I have to get going though, hope your journey goes well. Wind to your back and easy trails on your travels."

The older man nodded, "May Gallraen be with you lass, yer gonna need his help more than any of 'em."

Peggy looked at him, then chuckled and nodded, "Thank you sir. I would appreciate a bit of good fortune on this journey." She slapped the dust off her clothes, shook herself, and trotted off, leaving a small bit of dust behind her.

The man put his arm around his son, verifying again that he was all right from his fall, "Well. That was interestin', wasn't it lad? Good story t'tell at the family gathering fireside no doubt." He chuckled and patted the lad's back.

The lad nodded and watched Peggy as she went on her way, "We didn't even get her name, pa."

"Oh, no worries. Odd bit like that, her name will be all over th'place soon. We'll be able to add our story to all the others that I'm sure are going to follow. Nothin' that unusual kin stay hidden or unknown for long." He nodded good naturedly. "Usually sommat like that is got th'gods on their side for whatever reason. It's the stuff of legends! We'll find out her name. I guarantee it. Now . . . gather up those ropes an' lets git going! Time's a wastin'!"

Geo nodded and did as his father said, his eyes occasionally looking toward the small bit of dust that was thrown up by the running centaur. He realized his father was probably right. The stuff of legends, that's what she was. He rubbed his face. Guess legends weren't painless like in the books.

The God of Luck chuckled. Well, it was just as well he was keeping an eye on the little female centaur. He didn't know what his brother had been up to making her come into existence in the first place. At least he was pretty sure that his brother, Kolle, the God of Chaos, had something to do with it. It just reeked of his machinations. Gallraen shook his head. The thing this little filly lass had going for her was a personality that seemed in defiance of Kolle, which made him chuckle. How very lucky that was. He smirked, perhaps the man was right, this little Centaur was going to need some guidance, something other than just the little pushes from Kolle. Gallraen looked thoughtful. He hadn't gotten involved in much down on the world for a long time. But this . . . this seemed like something that needed his attention. He wasn't about to let Kolle just have his weird and twisted way with whatever scheme he was plotting. But . . . Gallraen knew he was going to have to be careful. He wasn't really accustomed to going behind the backs of his siblings, but, there was a first time for everything, right? That's what his father always said. He nodded to himself, yes, he needed to do something to help this little pawn. He smiled and started devising a plan.

Peggy sped up once her energy was up again from her lunch and she'd stopped shaking from the nervousness of the last encounter. The gallop helped to calm her nerves as well. How was she going to keep things like that from happening? Perhaps be sneakier? Hiding all the time? She snorted and tossed her head in amusement. Hide . . . right. Horses were not built for sneaking around in ANY fashion she doubted any attempt at subterfuge would fail immediately. Well then, perhaps just being bold would be the better option. The people back there seemed to take it in stride when she just behaved like herself. The whole incident probably wouldn't have even happened if she'd just been a bit bolder instead of trying to hide. She thought some more about her options. Well, she'd give it a shot, she would simply act like being around was absolutely nothing unusual. She knew better, but maybe if she could ACT like it wasn't unusual then perhaps the people she met would have the same reaction.

She'd be polite and friendly, that was actually very easy for her when she wasn't completely nervous. She'd have to work on the nervousness, obviously. Forcing herself to face people rather than have the urge to run and hide was going to take some effort. A lot of effort. She sighed. What made her think this was a good idea in the first place again? Was finding out where she came from really worth all this anxiety? She sped up, trying to just run the anxiety off even as her mind came up with thousands of potential horrible things that could happen the next time she met someone on this road . . . or when she finally got to the city. She finally slowed and sighed, looking up at the sun. She only had a few more hours of daylight, and she had no idea where she was going to sleep for the night. The cliffs were still on both sides of her. She realized her mistake in leaving so fast earlier. She should have asked those people where she would be able to spend the night, if there was such a place that they passed on their way.  Peggy sighed at her stupidity, this travelling thing was a lot harder to get used to than she anticipated. In the tales there was always convenient inns and kindly farmers at the proper places for rest.

She surveyed the terrain. She didn't want to sleep on the road that was just asking for trouble. Plus she'd been hoping to do some sort of hunting for dinner. She wanted some meat now after all the grains she'd had for lunch but it wasn't really looking like hunting would be possible, unless she attempted to shoot the black squirrels that were jumping in the trees. Even then, she probably wouldn't be able to retrieve whatever she shot, the hill was too steep. She sighed and continued, hoping that something would turn up to make her first night away from home at least sort of comfortable. Unfortunately, that thought simply made her homesickness hit her harder. If she were home she'd be having an early supper, working on her leather, perhaps sitting in the meadow and reading to her mother. That last thought did her in and made her stop and rub her eyes to rid herself of the tears that were threatening again. She felt so alone. So confused and unhappy and she didn't have anywhere to go or any friendly faces to cheer her.

"What's with the tears little one? I don't believe I've ever seen a centaur cry. I didn't think they were capable of it."

Peggy started, her eyes wide and she sidled in surprise at the voice that addressed her. Standing at the next bend in the road was a man leaning against the rock on the land side of the road. She stared at him in shock. He looked like a traveler, his clothing dusty but well made, a large pack on his back and a walking stick in his hand. He had a hat on his head which he'd pushed back so that he could look at her better. He seemed amused as he returned her gaze, but seemed to be waiting for her response. Peggy, however, wasn't much for conversation, especially with strangers that seemed to pop out of nowhere. She simply wiped her eyes and started to trot past him.

He held out his walking stick quickly, right at the point where her horse and human parts met. It made her have to stop, she didn't want to hurt him or herself, "Now then, that's not very polite. I asked you a question, you might as well answer it before you go on your way." He smiled in a very friendly manner. There wasn't any fear or anger about him, just a calm curiosity.

Peggy looked at him, her eyes still watery. "I've had . . . a rather bad day . . . and I don't even know where I'm going to sleep for the night, that's all."

He smiled wider, "Well, if that's all the problem is I happen to know where there's a good place to camp just a little way from here. If you like, I can guide you to it?" He cocked his head at her.

She gave him a very suspicious look, not trusting this sudden good fortune although she was very tempted. "How am I supposed to trust you?"

He shrugged, "I suppose there's not much I can do to get you to trust me, but I am genuinely trying to help." He smiled, "A female's tears are something I cannot abide and I would like to help make those tears change into a smile if that's a good enough reason for you? My name is Felix, traveler, storyteller, and fortune seeker." He removed his hat and bowed with a flourish, "Would you be so good as to give me your name, m'dear?"

Peggy looked at him closer. He had twinkling brown eyes, a tan face, and wavy sandy blonde hair that nearly matched the sand color of the road. But the thing that was most interesting about him was his smile. It lit up his whole face in a way that could not be artificial. Even his eyes held that smile. Other than that, he wasn't very remarkable. In fact, if she was to attempt to describe him she would have said he looked very normal. "My name is Peggy. I'm a leather worker." She did the best approximation of a curtsy that she could manage, bowing her head toward him.

"And a centaur as well, prettiest one I've ever met actually." He grinned at her.

Peggy was suddenly at alert, all her fear gone in a second as his words hit her, "You've met others? Where?! Where can I find them?!" She approached him eagerly.

Felix smiled at her, "Now now . . . let me take you to the camping place first, then I will tell you all I know about centaurs. I'd like to hear your story too, if I may?"

Peggy looked at him, suddenly shy again, until she was reminded of her relative size to this man and the fact that she would be more than capable of defending herself against him if anything happened. "All right. I don't think I'd mind the company. Lead on, Felix." She gave him a shy smile.

Felix beamed and started to lead the way, "Well then, Peggy, what brings you travelling down this road? You're a bit far from where most centaurs are found."

Peggy walked slowly behind him, making sure to keep alert in case something was up.  She didn't have her mother's sense of smell, but her ears were fairly good, she hoped they were good enough to detect any trouble when she was alert to the possibility. "I grew up just down the road at Oceanside. I'm actually trying to find other centaurs to find out how I ended up there."

Felix looked at her curiously, "A foundling then?"

Peggy shook her head. "No. I was born there. My mother is a full horse."
Felix's eyes widened in shock, "Really? But . . . is that even possible?!"

Peggy shrugged, "I'm here aren't I? I'm not really sure how it happened, but it happened and here I am. I think you can understand why I'd want answers."

Felix nodded, looking thoughtful, "Indeed. Those are answers I'd like to hear myself . . ." He turned the corner and came to a small section of bushes, "The camping area is through here . . . it's level but we'll have to get through the vegetation. There's a path." He pointed to the thin line of dirt surrounded by grass, "Do you think you can squeeze through?"

She didn't like the idea of squeezing through there, it would make it difficult to get back to the road in a hurry. She stomped nervously as she weighed her options. It was getting later and she was hungry and in need of sleep, neither of which she was going to manage if she stayed out exposed on the road. She took a deep breath. "I think so."

Felix nodded and seemed to sense her reluctance. He stayed close to her, but in front, helping push branches out of the way when she found herself blocked. It was slow going, no question, and she found her heart pounding from her rising nerves. Finally the closed in area gave way to a grassy, tree covered area. It did look like it was used many times by travelers. Felix smiled at her, "This is it. It's not the best know area, and it's usually only used by foot travelers, for obvious reasons." He chuckled.

Peggy nodded but kept looking around nervously. She wasn't sensing or hearing anyone else around, and she had to admit that the area felt very enclosed and safe. She rather liked it actually. It was even a tad warmer than out on the road, which meant sleeping would be more comfortable. "Yes, I imagine no one would want to leave their cart or horses unattended on the road if they were camping back here. No way to get back out there quickly really." She still didn't relax, standing close to the path they'd taken.

Felix, however, took off his pack, sitting down and leaning it against a tree before leaning against it himself. "Relax. It's just me. There are no places for anyone to hide in here really . . . the rocks are too steep, and there are no bushes and the trees are too far apart." He chuckled, "Sit down, Peggy. Tell me about yourself and I'll tell you about myself." His smile was friendly and his eyes twinkled again. "I make it a habit to collect interesting stories and you seem to have a very interesting one in my opinion."

Peggy continued to stand, but finally conceded to taking off her own saddlebags and hanging them on a low branch. "You first. You're the one who invited me in; I'd like to know more about you." She looked at him evenly, still not trusting him entirely as her hooves restlessly stomped at the grass.

Felix smiled, "Fair enough. You trusted me to not lead you into danger so I'll let you know about me." He settled back a little more against his pack, putting his hands behind his head. "I'm a traveler, my main interest is collecting stories that I can tell others. I'm a storyteller by trade. I've been many places and seen many things that no one else has. I also make a habit of verifying stories I've heard so that I have all the correct information before I start passing the wrong information." He smiled. "So . . . tell me your story? I'll tell you about the centaurs after you tell me about yourself." He crossed his legs and looked at her expectantly.

Peggy looked around and found a spot she could settle down on the ground. The grass looked so soft and it would be a relief to just rest her legs for a bit, even though getting up from a sitting position was rather difficult to do with any real speed. She eased herself down carefully and relaxed with a sigh, then told him her tale as far as she knew it, starting with her unexpected birth, her upbringing by her master and his wife, all the important things that happened to her, including the start of her journey to find out more information. She did include the strange behaviors of the villagers, and the moment her heart was broken by Thomas. She was embarrassed that she actually had to fight back the tears when she relived that moment, wiping her eyes and trying not to just lose it completely.

Felix held onto a respectful silence through her whole recitation, only asking a few questions for clarification. He actually looked sorry for her when she told about Thomas, and how she'd been treated by the villagers as she had left. He had actually been sympathetic to her behavior with the old man and his son, agreeing that, given the situation and what she knew, she was perfectly in the right doing what she did. He looked at her carefully after it was all told and she'd obviously run out of things to say, tapping his chin, "Well . . . I have to say . . . that's quite the history you've got." He looked at her. "Would you be willing to let me travel with you? I am quite knowledgeable, as you already know." He smirked as he gestured to the area they were in. "I would really like to help you find what you're looking for . . . mainly because now I'm curious as all hell to find out myself." He grinned at her.

Peggy blinked, surprised at the offer. She realized it would be nice to have someone with her to help her figure things out, how to act and where to go to find information or even something as simple as a good camping spot. "You'd do that? Travel with me?" she looked thoughtful for a moment. "I think I'd like that actually." She smiled at him. "Can you tell me about the other centaurs? Please?" She settled down a little more comfortably, leaning her head against one of the trees, her legs tucked under her.

Felix smiled, "I'd be delighted to, but I'm not sure it's going to information you're going to like." He frowned apologetically. "The centaurs I'm familiar with are very war like, brutal and cruel. All I've ever seen are males, I really don't know if there are female centaurs. They stage raids on human villages and kidnap human women for their pleasure." He looked at her, "I think you might have a little idea of what that might be like for a female human . . . not really very pleasant."

Peggy gaped and then shuddered at the thought. For her it would be nothing, but she'd witnessed humans having sex. Human males were remarkably small in her opinion, but the women they usually were with would comment on how big they were. If that were the case, then human women were obviously built for human men . . . not for what a centaur would be using. "That sounds . . . downright cruel." She began to wonder what would happen if she did come across these brutes. Would they just come after her immediately as sudden relief from such fragile victims? She didn't like that idea at all and frowned in concern.

Felix frowned at her reaction, "I'm sorry . . . I didn't mean to frighten you. But it is a possibility that you would be used in the same way if you actually appeared to them." He sighed, "Unless you're looking to get gang raped by the whole herd, I'd suggest we try to find information from other sources first, saving seeing the centaurs for a last resort." He nodded and looked apologetic.

Peggy looked disappointed and slumped a bit. Finding out your species is a bunch of over sexualized brutes was NOT the easiest information to swallow. And yet, she wasn't like that at all. She was probably the most opposite of that; timid, shy, blushing, and more wanting to help. She wondered if it had something to do with her gender, she had noticed that difference in humans as well . . . the males were, on the whole, more aggressive. Then again, not ALL of them were. Maybe there were a few bad apples that were giving the rest of the centaurs a bad name? She liked that idea a lot more than the thought of a bunch of ravening, violent male centaurs laying waste to everything. She sighed. "I suppose you're right, it's just . . . I was hoping to meet someone like me." Her face was melancholy as she gazed at him.

Felix smiled, "Peggy, there is no one like you, that's the point. You are completely and utterly unique. What we need to find for you is not someone like you, but a place that you'll fit in the best and be happy. That's really the best that anyone can hope for." He leaned back and looked at her closely, "But, we will find out how it's possible for you to even exist. Perhaps that will help with finding you a place to belong." His face was kind and sympathetic, as if this wasn't the first situation like this that he'd come across, but he also seemed confident that such a place for her existed.

Peggy thought about home and her mother. She did feel like she belonged there, until the villagers had decided for her that she didn't. "It would be nice to find a place like that, if it exists."

Felix smiled, "I'm sure it does, it just might take some looking." He suddenly got up. "Well, tell you what. I'll go see if I can hunt anything down if you could get a fire started to cook it? We can talk some more over dinner." He pulled a small bow and quiver from his pack, "I'll be back shortly." He quickly started climbing one of the smaller hills as Peggy watched in admiration.

"Fair enough." She heaved up out of her lying position and started  to build up a fire pit, digging it out with her hooves, feeling a strange sense of relief that she was no longer facing all of this unknown alone.
Part two from my NaNoWriMo! I'm just going to be posting what I write every three days, so as not to spam you every day with stuff.

Again, remember, this is very VERY rough, spur of the moment writing that I haven't even given a second glance at. Expect lots of errors of all sorts :forgiveme:

Previous:
Centaur: A Chaotic Tail Part 1Peggy looked out of the stable at the retreating form of the young man. Tears were flowing from her eyes. It really wasn't fair, but she supposed she should have expected that reaction. She rubbed her eyes mournfully. Still didn't make it any easier to take, especially since she did like him. A lot. He'd been so attentive and kind to her, and he was clever and smart. She had hoped, no, she'd PRAYED that he'd be different, that he would see her as the young women who's conversation and company he desired. Not as a freak. She stamped her foot hard into the ground in frustration, the tears still flowing, looking at the horseshoe shaped imprint h

Next:
Centaur: A Chaotic Tail Part 3By the time Peggy had the fire going and had actually started some water boiling, Felix came back with a couple of rabbits and what looked like a large handful of some sort of tuber. They cooked in relative silence, merely asking or giving cooking advice to each other. Felix also took out some bread to add to the meal, and Peggy had some sweets that her master's wife had given her, so the meal was actually quite pleasant and filling. Felix had started making a bed for himself on the ground on the other side of the fire by the time Peggy finished eating. She really did eat a lot, but she never felt really full, she wondered sometimes if she ha


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Tete-DePunk's avatar

Critique:


Journey:

 

Why does Felix suddenly give off Odin vibes? Like Odin the Allfather journeying through the realms in the guise of a wanderer?

Wait! *Reads below comments*…


So Felix isn’t the God of Luck is disguise? Ah! But he really did that vibe though. Particularly, the description of his clothing just screamed “Odin/god disguised as a wanderer”! :wow: :phew:

Felix definitely matches Peggy in equal parts of consideration, generosity and sincerity.


Again, the naturalness of their meeting and dialogue exchange shines brightly here. Given our cynicism justified by an increase of violence in society and perpetuated by media, we almost half-expected for Felix to be secretly an underhanded antagonist out to use Peggy for his gain. But here, our fears are allayed through Felix’s own personal revelations that his thoughts tell us.

He truly is a wanderer, and a storyteller. But he seeks to verify his stories, so in essence, we can call him something like an unorthodox oral historian.


Peggy’s wariness is marked by a certain inexperience, she throws herself into something once she tests “the ice is thick enough”, as the saying goes. On the other hand, Felix’s enthusiasm definitely shows a tried-but-true experience of prudence. He doesn’t rush into plans or ideas, but cautiously gather facts, establishes connections to wherever he wanders, and proceeds gingerly.


The development of their alliance has a good-natured realism. The pacing here is quicker, but it makes sense. When one is on journey, comrades often form all the quicker. It’s rare but realistic when one “clicks” with a person and forms an almost instantaneous trust.

To be sure, Peggy had her rightful doubts- a singularity like herself, no doubt there are those who want to capture her. But Felix shows his trustworthiness by his actions. He never forces Peggy into trusting him, and offers generously of his own supplies and shares his own wealth of knowledge.


In this way, Felix becomes the guide figure in the hero/heroine’s journey.


But we don’t know quite his full purpose. Even Felix is set to only focus on helping Peggy find out about her origins. He aims to procure facts to his next and what could be his greatest tale he’s ever shared.

Felix is also a realist- while he doesn’t shoot down Peggy’s ambition to find beings like herself, he does caution about disappointment and not finding what we exactly want. He advises finding a reality of finding a place to belong to, which establishes the real security and completeness of life.

 

Peggy is a realist in her own way. She rationalizes that not ALL centaurs could be violent, pillaging males. And her view contain validity. Often, a group can become labeled or “franchised” (opposite of disenfranchised) by outsiders because of a choice few being seen as the only example of exposure. This is pretty much the foundation of most human prejudice.



Details:


One thing interesting in this story is how you think of every detail.

You took special care into thinking about the strains and the working of a centaur’s anatomy, and a female centaur’s anatomy at that. From how her muscles and limbs would work (Peggy’s explanation of how she tried to sleep standing up was realistic, it’s not something we often think on, how a centaur is truly divided between equine and human anatomical structures and limitations) to her own sense of human vulnerability, the dual form demands a balance of special care- care for the human half, but also caution for her equine half as well.


Another feature that grounds a reader into the story’s world is keeping consistency with actions in their surroundings. Peggy takes in account of finding places she can climb into with her equine half, but also taking caution of ducking because of her human half height as well.

Though one question- did Felix choose the footpath because he was familiar with it? Or because he wanted to protect Peggy from potential captors?

Again, the pacing is brilliant here- I cannot describe how much I am enjoying reading Peggy’s story!! :squee:

Consider yourself having a new and loyal reader of Centaur: A Chaotic Tail!